It's all good in the id!

Sunday thoughts

2012-01-15T20:12:00.001-05:00

I have so much reading to do for my classes!

My kitchen is a mess

I left my planner at work and I feel very scattered

I folded 6421686421 loads of laundry and I am still not done

I like this phone blogging:-)

Hey

2012-01-14T20:02:00.001-05:00

I can blog from my phone!! Whoo hoo! Here is a picture of Loki PuppBoy to brighten your day.

The week of being sick and dodging serial killers

2011-10-14T17:32:00.000-04:00

The Man was in Mexico from Monday to today. I decided to get sick Sunday and I wasn't able to go to work until Wednesday and that was only for a half day. On Tuesday I read an article on how serial killers picked their victims. One of the ways is that they learn the victims schedule and the example that they gave was when the lights in the house were turned off. This would signify when the victim was comfy cozy in their PJ's not realizing that a crazed killer was waiting for them to go to sleepy doodles.

So what do I do?

I turn every light on in the house and then I start to turn off random lights at different times throughout the night to confuse the crazed killer watching me!

HA! Take that crazy pants I am even CRAZIER (in a non-killing way cute way)than you and it would be easier for you to choose a different victim.

Laugh if you want to but I AM STILL ALIVE so it must have worked:-) Tired but alive!!

Hugs

FRIDAY!!

2011-09-09T21:00:00.000-04:00

Allo Loves,

So this week has dragged on like it was never going to end. I had a ton to do for work and this grad school gig started off with a bazillion chapters to read:-(

I definitely have to get in the groove and get organized.

In other news:

I am so excited that it is finally cooler in Michigan. I love the fall season from the cooler temperatures to the darker makeup! I don't wear as much red lipstick in the spring or summer so I rock it during the fall and winter.

We are doing some fun projects around the house!

Can you believe that I still have Mommakin boxes to go through? I am thinking one lazy day I will drag The Man to the basement (sounds sinister no?) to keep me company while I go through them.

I need to find an easier way to get my pictures off my phone onto my computer so I can post pictures of my new planner. I have my real name on it and The Man has asked that I keep some part of my identity secret (much like the superhero that I am) so I will have to get creative to cover up my name.

I am getting my hairs colored next week and I am rather giddy about it!

I also ordered some nifty cards that have my name, cell number and email on them since we are doing group projects this semester and quite honestly I will feel sassy giving them out. Yeah I am a dork but I am dork with really cute cards so eh!

I am opened my pie hole during a meeting and somehow I ended up volunteering to put together the Adoption Orientation binder. I refer to it as my "pie hole" when it gets me in trouble otherwise it is known as my mouth or my yap, you know depending on my mood and such.

The Cousin is coming to town and I find myself humming "Santa Claus is coming to town" and substituting her name for Santa Claus. This may account to me getting strange looks at the office.

Off to finish my discussion paper although I really feel that I have moved on from the discussion of free education in Utah.

Hugs

I think

Hello Again!

2011-09-05T15:27:00.000-04:00

WOW
This is embarrassing in many ways. I can't believe that I haven't blogged since what January?

I realize that not one is reading this anymore but I am commenting more on other blogs and I have to say I really really miss blogging.

So what is new you ask?

LOTS!!!

The Smart Girl made her First Holy Communion and once I figure out how to post pictures again I will.

The Cousin had a baby and her middle name is my mom's first name..LOVE IT!

I got in the MSW program at another university which is making me feel all smart and stuff:-)

The Man? AWESOME as ever.

Work is going well now that I did four massive reports in ONE WEEK:-(

I am really going to try and be a better blogger. This is just embarrassing that I have neglected this bit of blogland for so very long.

Hugs

Things I am loving RIGHT NOW

2011-02-25T20:05:00.002-05:00

*** Sending gifts in classy shiny gold puffy envelopes

*** Oatmeally giving me a gift card for Star*ucks so I can get coffee with the Scrapbook girl

*** New Spring nail polish

*** A warm puppy, a comfy couch and cozy blanket

*** A husband who thinks I am cute when I have no makeup on

*** New planner pages

*** People telling me that I am a good adoption specialist

*** Having Smart Girl tell me she is excited about going to her first Reconciliation

Things I am not loving RIGHT NOW

*** Jury Duty

*** Having to sit still and NOT TALK for three WHOLE HOURS DEAR GOD MAKE IT STOP!!!

Hugs

One Year

2011-01-30T14:27:00.003-05:00

Mommakins,

Tomorrow is the one year anniversary of the worst day of my life. I can't believe that I lost you so fast but really when I think using my head and not my heart the signs were there but I wouldn't let myself see them. You weren't bouncing back after having your stomach drained, you were constantly tired and you didn't even want to go shopping.

I wish with every fiber of my soul that I forced you to go to the ER the week before you died. You said you were feeling better and I believed you. I thank God that the last thing I ever said to you was " I love you" and you said it back. I have never prayed as hard as I did the last day of your life. God answered my prayers but not in the way I wanted but in the end I have to admit that I was praying for you to find peace and not be in pain anymore. I know that you are with Nana and I hope you are playing cards and laughing.

The week of the funeral I took one of your pain pills because I hurt so bad I was in physical pain and I had the worst dream. I woke up crying because you told me that you weren't dead you just didn't want to be my mom anymore. That was the last time that I took a pain pill and it was the last time that I dreamt about you until just recently. In my dreams now you are happy and healthy. You keep telling me to go and that you will always be with me.

It has taken me a year but most days I can think of you and smile and not cry. I think of all of the messes that we got into and the fights and the jokes and lazy days watching old movies (which I hated at the time but damn now I find myself pausing when I come across a John Wayne movie...OYE).

I am going through the old pictures and I smile at how happy you were growing up and getting married and then it was the just the two of us but you still had a sparkle in your eyes. I am trying to get the wedding pictures in some sort of order and I smile remembering the fun we had planning my wedding. You were so eager to be included in the planning but you were so careful to not take over because it was my wedding not yours. You were so beautiful on my wedding day and you just glowed with happiness even though dad was late. I thank God that you heard me say "I do" !

I miss you every day but I think you would be proud of how your little family has handled you not being here with us. The Cousin and I email or text almost everyday. I have leaned on her more than ever this year. I sent the Hero some pictures and we talk a lot more than we did before. The Man and I hang out with Goosey and Uncle Nernie a lot. The Man and I are still going strong,even stronger than before. He is my rock and I love him more everyday. Oatmeally is still my voice of reason.

I miss you everyday but I talk to you in my heart and I know that you go where I go. The last year of your life you started telling me that you loved me "forever and always".

I love you forever and always:-)

1st Thanksgiving

2010-11-26T20:22:00.002-05:00

Thanksgiving was my mom's favorite holiday. She enjoyed Easter until my Grandma was in the hospital for a couple of years before she died and Christmas was stressful but she really loved Thanksgiving.

Since the second Thanksgiving that The Man and I were dating we have gone to the Ohio Momma's for dinner and we would pick up the Mommakins on the way back at my Aunt's house. We would have snacks and maybe a piece of pie with my side of the family. On the way home mom and I would plot our shopping strategy and The Man would drive and shake his head while telling us we were crazy. We would drop her off at her apartment and I would remind her to set her alarm and not to take her water pill because we would be entirely too busy for her many pee breaks.

Well we went to the Ohio Momma's for dinner and it was lovely.
We went to my Aunt's house and I had two pieces of oddly spicy cheese.
Then we left.
No Rosie Posie in our backseat just the Loki Puppy.
I spent the entire car ride to the Pastel One's house crying.
This new tradition is so very wrong.

So apparently I have MUNGE!

2010-11-11T19:34:00.002-05:00

Yes that is a medical condition. I believe that it covers everything from a papercut to your head falling off on a cloudy Tuesday afternoon. The Man has been sick since last week and whooo boy I done got sick on Sunday night. I went back to work today and I had NO LESS than half the floor tell me that I look horrible and please just go home for the love of the Balded Headed Baby Jesus! I went to lunch and I got back from lunch and then I threw up lunch. Yes it was lovely indeed.

Anyway I got dressed for work this morning in a lovely comfy outfit and I thought my shoe felt odd ( the left one for those of you that are curious) but I ignored it because: A. I was running late as usual and I needed to get gas this morning and B. I didn't feel like bending allllll the waaaaay dooowwwnnn ( no, I in no way resemble a giant however my head feels like my brain is a size 4x smooshed into a XS skull) to see what the heck was going on. Anyway I got to work and I was chatting with a co-worker about how bad I looked today (lovely folks that I work with, no really) and I checked out my odd left shoe and LO it was split. The sole was split!!!!! THE HORROR!

Yeah anyway when I left work early because I had thrown up my scrambled eggs and I was all hot and sweaty (why yes I did indeed have a fever) I stopped at a shoe store and bought some black shoes (actually I bought 4 pairs but who is counting?) (Actually The Man keeps count but really he is just silly for thinking that I only need one pair of black shoes) (A symptom of MUNGE is a love for ()).

So ummm yeah hmmm what is new with you?

Oh Funny Story

Scrapbook Girl is also my nail polish shopping buddy. Really you should go with us the next time we go shopping. We are like two well dressed crack heads pushing the other to take one more hit! Yeah I watch Intervention don't you? Seriously I can't shop with her when I am watching my budget (The Man thinks I should always watch a budget, I say HA! I really don't think it is just a coincidence that we entered a ression THE MONTH that I got married and he actually gave me a budget (or something like a budget I believe he said "I like living in a house so lets watch the shopping") and we started to get out of the recession once he found a job and I could shop on a small scale again!) Between the two of us we should be getting a mighty nice Christmas gift from OPIE (a dear friend actually called O.P.I OPIE.) and her sister Essie. Anyhoo I sent her a FB message telling her that a new winter line came out and she sent me a polite reply. WHAT???

WTF!

So of course I called and said "BEEYATCH when I send you such important news you should reply " I am getting my shoes on, when will you be here?" Not something along the line of "Why yes that sounds delightful and it is a definite possibility" My world righted itself when she said she was doing job searching stuff so she was in a professional mode:-) Well alrighty then and yeah we still haven't gone shopping becaues of this MUNGE that I have however once I am MUNGE free we shall shop!

Oh happy story.

I put on one of my mommakins coats today and it still smelled like her:-)

3 Years of HAPPY!!

2010-10-04T14:24:00.002-04:00

Our wedding anniversary is October 6 however we are celebrating on the 5th since The Man has choir practice on the 6th:-) My boy? He sings like an angel!

DAMN a lot has happened in 3 short years!

In 2007
--He was employed at Company A
--I was in a Masters program
--I was employed
--I had a momma

In 2008
--I was not employed
--I was dismissed from my Masters program (BEWARE OF C's!!!)
--I found a job rather quickly after being dismissed but I still thought it wasn't quick enough!

In 2009
--The Man was downsized from Company A in Feb
--We realize how blessed we are that I still have a job that provides health insurance
--We are never in danger of losing our house THANK GOD!
--He is able to take my mom to her various Dr appointments.
--He starts his new job at the end of November

In 2010
--I lost my momma

Yes it has been quite the roller coaster of emotions but I still thank God every night for him and his love. I feel like I can do anything as long as he is beside me!

Things I have learned since being married:
-- NEVER EVER throw out an electrical cord because as soon as you do The Man will need it!
--Patience is virtue and I don't have any but I am working on it!
--That magazine from 2000? Keep it! He may need an article from it some day
--Real Men do not get their hair cut at a salon. They go to Barber shops that close whenever the owner wants to go fishing.

I can't wait to see what the next year holds for us:-)

I love you HotPants German Lastname!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Last Day

2010-09-14T21:01:00.002-04:00

I have been struggling a bit with this grief thing. I keep playing back the last moments of my mom's life at the oddest times. I find myself tearing up at court, watching a Scooby Doo cartoon (don't judge me! I love Scooby Doo!!), doing my nails, watching the Golden Girls (again stop judging me!), etc......

I think maybe if I write it down I can maybe let go of the bad memories and start remembering the good times and yes there were plenty of good times with Rosie Posie Girl!

Sooo here I go

My best friend from grade school Dinky lost her mom the week that my mom went into the hospital and Saturday January 30 was the funeral. The dr said that they were going to do a test on Saturday to see what was going on with my mom's brain activity. At this point we thought we were seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and it would only be a matter of time before she started to show signs of recovery. They did the test really early Saturday morning and The Man and I were going to the funeral and then to the hospital. My aunt and uncle were coming to the hospital early to be with my mom and then we would take the late shift. Now all of the numbers that we need to go down were going down so really we did have hope. Anyway we were on the way to the funeral luncheon and my uncle called to ask when were coming to the hospital. I said after the luncheon and I asked if everything was ok and he said yeah he was just wondering. We quickly ate and went to the hospital.

The doctor came in shortly after we got to the hospital and he told us the results of the test were not good in any way shape or form. There was minimal brain activity and there was very little chance of a total recovery. I just sat there and sobbed on my aunt while The Man was rubbing my back telling me he loves me. I said that it wasn't fair to her to keep her going if there really wasn't any hope. My mom had always been crystal clear that she did not want to be on life support and I needed to be strong and let her go. She also stressed the importance of getting a second opinion. My uncle agreed with me and we started to call my cousins to get here as quickly as possible. The Man called his parents who were dealing with a crisis of their own with their youngest son in a different state so they couldn't come but they started praying. I called my dad and I just sobbed and told him to get to the hospital NOW. He did. I called the Oatmeally and then I called her again since she couldn't understand my message. My friends all got to the hospital and to this day I have no idea who called who. I just remember calling my dad and Oatmeally.

The Dr came back and told us that he had talked to her normal doctor and he suggested giving her another 24 hours to allow her more time on the different medications. We agreed as a family to give her another 24 hours.

It was the longest day, afternoon and evening of my life. We were all at the hospital making that odd chit chat that people do when they are nervous and scared. I walked back and forth between the waiting room and her room.

Our priest came and prayed with us. The same priest who saw my mom walk down the aisle of our wedding saw her in that stupid hospital room. He stayed for awhile and he was comforting.

The nurse came in and she made my mom more comfortable and then she moved the sheet. I won't go into details because I can't wrap my mind around it but it was obvious that my momma was shutting down quickly and the 24th hour had arrived. The Cousin arrived and we cried together. I called the Hero cousin and Moaners answered the phone and I told her that when they got there they would have time to say good-bye but afterward we were pulling the machines.

The Hero was always really close to my mom, both my cousins were and neither one of them wanted to remember her in that way so the good-byes were short.

We all prayed around her again and then we had to leave the room while the nurses did something in her room. We walked in and waited for the dr to get there with the papers for me to sign.

He finally arrived and he was actually really nice and comforting, he explained the paperwork to me but I can't remember a word he said. I signed my full name without a problem for the first two papers but the third and final form I broke down. The Man was right there with me and he gave me the strength to sign the final form.

We said good bye again. I held her hand for awhile.
It was silent in the room with just the beeping of the machines. They started getting further and further apart. They finally stopped and just like that my mommakins was gone.

I walked out of the room and I had to sign more forms.

I walked in the waiting room to tell everyone that she was gone and then I had to leave that hospital.

I could not be in that building for one more second. I felt like screaming and crying and throwing the worst tantrum of my life.

I know that I am loved. I have a great husband, the best family, awesome friends and I still have my dad but there is nothing like the love of a mother.

I am Catholic and I know with every fiber of my being that my mom is in a better place and I know with equal certainity that she is with Baby Jesus.

I also know that I would give anything to hear her voice again.

To get another text

To eat chips and dip while playing cards with her, my nana and The Cousin

To just give her a look and know that she "got it"

To argue with her

To read TV with her

To tell her that The Man was her favorite and watch her smile and giggle while shaking her head

To hear her call The Hero her Angel and watch a grown military man smile like a little boy knowing that he is loved.

To tell her she was my pain in my ass and watch her smile and tell me that moms live to hear that from their grown children.

To know that one person on this planet thought I was the best thing that ever happened to them and that my birth made her life worth it.

Top FIVE Signs you are missing The Cousin

2010-09-06T19:50:00.002-04:00

5. You start reading the Sports section, even though you have absolutely no interest in sports. Oh you also make a semi-intelligent remark regarding States defense.

4.You crave Coney dogs despite having an ANGRY British BUM

3. You rub your nose by starting by your mouth and moving your entire hand up your face causing your nose to bend in a way the Bald Headed Baby Jesus never intended

2. You start keeping your phone right by you to text people while carrying on four different conversations

1. You start pricing air fare from here to Jersey or New York or anywhere that sounds like it might be close to her.

This week

2010-08-28T16:04:00.002-04:00

There are days that I absolutely love my job. I get to help children find their "forever families" that is an awesome responsibility but when things go right the reward is equally awesome.

I am blessed that I even have a job since I live in Michigan and we are going through a rough patch and believe me I don't take it for granted.

I am blessed that my husband is working and we are hoping that he continues to work since his project is almost done and he is contractual but yeah he is working.

There are weeks though that make me wonder why I just don't quit and make catnip socks or something!

This week my friends are one of "those" weeks. I had a court activity on four days and I had a bad day at court four times this week.

On the bright side of this week The Man turned 34 on Thursday!! We are celebrating with family on Sunday:-)

Things I am digging RIGHT NOW

2010-07-20T21:38:00.002-04:00

My husband
Loki Pupp sticking his head through the fence to bark hello
Getting text from The Cousin telling me she got bangs and referring to it as "Big News"
Getting a letter from my Godson telling me he likes my random letters
Calling the Oatie and having her finish my sentence for me
K-Pooh not being ashamed of me and my blue bra:-)
Remembering my silly momma and being able to laugh before I get teary.

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-09T16:30:00.004-04:00

So this was my first Mother's Day without my mommakins.

It did indeed suck as badly as I thought it would.

G-D I miss her so much.

I know she is in Heaven but I really want her here with me:-(

How I met The Man

2010-04-23T17:52:00.002-04:00

Kelly at Kelly's Korner has this neato (yeah I just typed "neato" WOW can you smell the lameness??) feature on her blog every Friday. On Friday's she posts a topic and you link to her site and share your story as it relates to the topic. I, being lame, cannot do such linky magic so only you can read my FABULOUS story on how I met The Man.

Here it goes......

Wait for it........

I was thisclose to giving up on meeting anyone worth dating much less THE ONE when I stumbled across the joy of internet dating. I researched some sites. Research meaning surfing various sites while "working" at a real estate office on the weekends and calling the ScrapBook Girl and Oatmeally and DEMANDING that they drop everything to listen to me read some dork cheese profiles. We would laugh and then wonder if people actually met on those sites and LO' one of our friends married the chickee he met on a dating site. That gave me hope and I started getting serious about joining an internet dating site. I quickly dismissed the ones that had lady bits in the title because although my bits are pretty rockin' I thought in a completely non judgemental way that maybe quality people were not to be found on such sites. Anyway I ended up deciding to join a faith based dating site because in the event that I found THE ONE it would be helpful if THE ONE was also THE CATHOLIC ONE because my child is going to be raised Catholic (Not something I was going to be flexible about) so ya know better to have the cards on the table from the very beginning. Anyhooo I joined Catholic***Singles dot com. I may have also joined J**Date dot com and then wondered why one of the questions was how kosher is my diet...ummm hmmm.

So I joined and I waited!
Waiting.....
Yep still waiting.
Started talking to two guys (one of them The Man)
Went on a date with the other guy
Considered playing for the other team.
Decided that I wanted to only talk to the quiet engineer guy.
Liked his emails, they made me smile:-)
Started emailing off the dating site
Talked to him on the phone (good phone voice)
Decided we needed to meet
Met in April 2004
Decided in August 2004 he was THE ONE ( I now need to convince him)
He said "I love you" in December 2004
Got engaged April 2006 (The 11th to be exact)
Said " I DO" on Oct 6, 2007

Thank G-d everyday for him:-)

Mom's Birthday

2010-04-12T17:05:00.002-04:00

Tomorrow is my mom's birthday. I am dreading it and I have taken tomorrow off from work. I don't need to be a weepy mess at work.

I miss her so much some days, other days I just miss her.

I miss our texts
I miss her calling me "funny face" or "peanut"
I miss kissing her on her forehead after she made a big deal of wiping it off:-)
I miss doing her Tarjay runs
I miss being able to text her when work gets bad or The Man and I are having a bad day.
I miss gossiping with her
I miss arguing with her
Most of all, I miss being her little girl.

My mom dedicated this song to me at my Prom, which she could do since she was a chaperon.

Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain

If I see you next to never
How can we say forever

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I took for granted, all the times
That I though would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' CrAzY

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me goin' cRaZy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

By Richard Marx.

Happy Birthday Mommakins!

Question

2010-03-19T18:12:00.001-04:00

What happened to My Brunette Reality?

Thoughts

2010-03-15T20:22:00.002-04:00

I think I am doing well dealing with this grief nonsense. I mean I made all of the calls that I had to do (except her lights, I completely forgot about the lights until I typed that sentence), I have sent out the majority of the thank you cards (except for the special ones, I am having trouble writing some of those to the family) and her stuff is out of the apartment. I am smiling and saying the right thing when the majority of people ask me how I am doing. Only The Man, Cousin and Oatmeally know how I am really doing when I completely let my guard down and I can sob freely. Scrapbook Girl lost her mom so I can share with her but really The Man is the one who knows that I am hanging on by a thread most nights.

I find myself going to work, writing reports and going to a million mandatory meetings that are meaningless. I go on my home visits and I get hugs from my kids which is lovely. I go through the motions of being the Duchess but I don't feel like me. I feel like I am in a bad lif*time movie that is being narrated by a 80's actress. I feel like I am only go through the motions of being me but I am just an outline of me. Does that make any sense?

I guess I just want to be the me that had a mom. I will get used to being this me that doesn't have a mom but that doesn't mean I have to like it!

Rough day

2010-02-20T14:50:00.002-05:00

Today we had plans to go to the bank and then to the funeral home to pay off the balance of my mom's funeral. We get there and find out that she is there. Her ashes are there waiting for pick up. WOW, I was so not mentally prepared for that today. You know just when you think you have hit the bottom you find out it was only a false floor and there is another layer of pure ick below.

My momma is in two boxes and it hurts.

Hell and gratitude

2010-02-04T10:20:00.005-05:00

My mom went into the hospital on Wednesday and she was buried a week later. This has thrown me for a loop. My entire family and friends circled the wagons around me and my mommakins. There were so many emotions that I have gone through since last Wednesday. But the biggest positive emotion that I have gone through as been gratitude.

On Friday we had hope and on Saturday I was told that I had to make the hardest decision that a daughter will ever have to make and I did make it knowing that I was surrounded by my family and I was following my mom's final wishes. She raised me to be a strong woman and I drew upon her strength to sign those nasty papers. I signed those papers surrounded by family and my mommakins left this world surrounded by her family and I know in my heart she felt our love as she left.

As I was praying for my mommakins to not hurt anymore while praying for a miracle I knew that I was not alone at any point.

My husband was by my side constantly offering his comfort and strength. He never left my side. He kept reminding me that I was following my momma's wishes and that I had him to lean on and he wasn't going anywhere.

My cousin was on her way with her little family. She held me as I was holding my momma's hand letting her go.

My hero cousin was driving through blizzard conditions with his family to get to our side. My Moaners was constantly texting me offering her support as she was offering her support to my hero cousin and being strong for her sons and dealing with her own grief.

My aunt and uncle stayed with me through this entire hell. My uncle who has always be strong and the leader of our little family offered me his strength and wisdom as I struggled to make the decisions that had to me made with my mommakins comfort and wishes as the most important goal. My aunt let me cry on her and gave me the strength to let my mom go.

My Ohio family praying for my mom and me as they dealt with their own family crisis.

My Stinky and Step monster who stayed with me in the hospital until the bitter end. They let me cry on them and brought us dinner.

My Oatmeally who came as soon as she got my second frantic call (she couldn't understand the first one) and who stayed until the bitter end. She held my hand as I sobbed.

My K-Pooh who stayed with me far into the night which is huge since she tends to get a bit loopy late at night. She let me cry on her. She offered her quiet support while I sobbed on her.

My Pastel One who came to the hospital and offered her support. She was with me on Monday and she never left my side as I had to go into my mom's apartment for the first time and while I made the funeral arrangements.

My Bunny-Butt who kept my other friends updated with texts. She kept me smiling with her jokes even when I thought I would never smile. She stayed until the bitter end.

My Dinky who came to the hospital even though she buried her momma that morning. She was strong for me even when I knew she was hurting inside.

My Scrapbook Girl and Blondie who were engaging in cult activities kept texting me offering support even though I know that this was bringing up memories of losing their own momma's not long ago. I sent them a text when my mommakins was gone and they were awake even though it was after 4 in the morning.

I will thank G-d every day of my life for all of these people who were there for me while I went through the worst experience of my life. I have no idea what I did to deserve such awesome people but I will be forever grateful for each of them for the rest of my life.

January 31,2010

2010-01-31T15:55:00.003-05:00

My mommakins is gone.

This world lost a great lady and this daughter lost an awesome mommakins.

I keep trying to tell myself that she is at peace and out of pain but damn I miss her so very much.

Whooosh that was a week!

2010-01-24T15:58:00.002-05:00

I had Monday off so technically this was a four day week however I feel like it was a ten day work week. Good Lord it was bad. I did kick some report booty however it just seemed like I was putting out fires every time I turned around! My nasty case is driving me batty. My director and his boss keep asking how it is going which just makes me feel like I am not doing anything but I don't think that is their intent. This family is just so awful that the entire agency just wants them to LEAVE!! So anyway I finally got the final draft of the home assessment completed and I turned it into my supervisor who is taking her sweet time to read it and sign off on it. LORD that is annoying. I was all excited that I didn't have court this week however my supervisor asked me to cover two hearings for her so now I have court on Monday and Tuesday. Lovely.

On the mom front I am now in charge of her wound care. Why yes it is as exciting as it sounds! I hate feet and I don't like to touch, see or smell them. My mom's wound? On her left foot. My life is somewhat poopey at times.

The Man and I joined our city's fitness center and my hope is that since we both joined he will be my inspiration to actually go and you know do fitness "stuff". The Man is shooting for three times a week. I am just excited because even if we only go once a week that is once more than we had been going:-)

The house is looking awful and I have no motivation to clean. Story of my life! I am excited that I got all new cleaning products this week. I like the Method brand from Tarjay and we got everything that they carry. It smells yummy and it doesn't cause my asthma to go all wonky. Maybe I will get a huge inspiration and actually clean sometime today.

Hugs my loves,

Hola Peeps!

2010-01-16T17:13:00.002-05:00

The flu hit Casa de German Last Name TWICE for the love of G-d!!
Yeah it was not pretty my loves, not pretty at all. I am feeling better though today so The Man and I went out today to do some shopping. We have a nice market in Livonia that I like to go to but The Man feels that it is too expensive but today I won the "discussion" so we went:-) I bought some expensive, for cheese, cheese, wine, dipping oil and yummy bread. So we had a little picnic in our living room. It was very nice and romantic until The Man and I realized that we really don't like wine so he walked to 7-11 to get 7-Up and we made wine spritzers. Yep we are so hip:-)

I have been looking at the Kindle and do any of you have any thoughts about it? I LOVE to read but I tend to be old school and I like holding the book and I have thing for the way books smell. I love the smell of an old book. Anyhoo it would be an investment so I am doing more research. The Man thinks I just want one because it is new and shiny, I tend to disagree with his assessment but whatever.

In case any of you are wondering the Cousin did indeed return the green wallet with the gold snap however she scored a black bag so all is good:-)

Hugs,

Resolutions

2010-01-02T17:38:00.002-05:00

I stink at keeping resolutions but I make them anyway. So here are my resolutions for 2010:
-Volunteer somewhere
-Apply for MSW program at WSU
-Get pregnant or start researching other options
-Get our house organized in some sort of fashion
-Work out at least once a week (small steps people small steps)

These resolutions are important to me so I am hoping that I can keep them.

What are you resolutions?

The decade in review

2009-12-30T07:58:00.002-05:00

This appears to be the thing to do so I am doing it:=)

2000--Hmm I was working at a bank and a real estate office. I had also dropped out of college which shall go down as the dumbest thing I have ever done.

2001--Still working at a bank and doing really nothing with my life. Then 9-11 happened and everything changed. I read each and every one of the Portraits of Grief that the New York Times did and I cried for each and every one of those people who were listed. One of the things that stood out in my mind were that all of them LOVED their jobs. I started thinking what would my portrait of grief say and I didn't like what I saw in my head.

2002--Quit the bank to go back to school in August. Still working in the real estate office and started taking classes at a community college to get back in the groove with the school thing.

2003--Holy Moly I turned 30. I went back to the university that I had dropped out of before and began working on my last two years of my Bachelors degree. Of course the two classes that I need to take when I had dropped out previously had turned into two YEARS of new requirements.

2004--Turned 31 on April 28. Meet The Man on April 30. Life is looking good!!! I decide in August that we are meant to be together for the rest of our lives. Spend the next year and half convincing The Man that I am right=) In December he tells me that he loves me---Swoon!

2005--GRADUATE with my Bachelors which took me 11 years for a 4 year degree. Yep, see not so smart at times. Get my first big girl job that requires a degree. Meet some of my dearest friends. Meet some kids that I want to hug and tell them it is not their fault. Meet some adults who need to have their heads smacked over and over again. Still loving The Man. Mommakins breaks her leg on July 15 and I start my job on July 18. FUN TIMES!

2006--On April 8, 2009 The Man and I go shopping to look at rings. We have a drag out full blown argument on the way to the store. I am crying, he is pissed which is clearly the mind set you need to be in to go looking at engagement rings. He apologizes and desperately hopes that I am distracted from my tears by the bright shiny goodness of diamonds. I am! We go into the first store which is nice but nothing pops out. Show The Man a yellow diamond. He informs me that the diamond looks like pee. Realize that I am probably not getting a yellow diamond. Moving on... Go into more stores,one of which contains a saleslady who tells me that I need a BIG ring since I have short CHUBBY fingers, dragged out of the store by The Man still sputtering vowing to go ghetto Mexican on her sorry ass if only The Man would let go of my arms. Go back to the first store. Really look at the rings, play with diamonds and meet the owner of the store who is lovely. Find MY ring. Show my trembling finger to The Man. The Man hears himself telling the lady that we will take the ring! I run out of the store to call one of my friends from the big girl job! On April 11 The Man takes my father out to lunch to ask for my hand in marriage.l He gives his blessing and we begin to plan our WEDDING! Start grad school.

2007-- Spend the majority of the year planning our wedding. Working and going to school. We get MARRIED on October 6! We have the worst first Christmas on record.

2008-- Lose my job because of a short nasty little man. Still going to school. Find a part time job. Get kicked out of school for poor assessment papers. Bitter!! Get a full time job a month of after the school nonsense. My beloved Allie Cat dies on the same day that I find out about the full time job. Still madly in love with The Man!!

2009--The Man loses his job in Feb=( Finds a contractor job in Nov=) Realize that I will have to have a Masters in something to get any where in my field. Resign myself to getting a MSW and vow to begin that program in 2010.

I am looking forward to 2010. I am hoping to begin my MSW program and we are hoping to add a little one to our family next year. How about you?

Merry Christmas

2009-12-27T19:40:00.001-05:00

What you thought I would post this on Christmas? Silly Silly blog readers this is the Duchess we are talking about:-)

We had a lovely Christmas at Casa de German Last name! I got a lovely ring and earrings that match the lovely ring! Diamonds and gold make a Latina Princess very happy indeed:-) The Man got an Xbox 360, some games, socks, an IPod stereo thingee and various odds and ends.

I got a Coach bag from the Mommakins and a Vera Bradley bag from the Ohio Momma/Ohio family. I also got a pretty groovy Coach change purse from The Cousin. I got her a green Coach wallet that I think may match her purse however the buckle is yellow gold and The Cousin? Well she has some deeply held beliefs about gold. While she is indeed a good Mexican she is only Mexican on her dad's side so she likes her gold to be white. Me? I am Mexican on both sides so I like me some old school yellow gold.

The Cousin didn't come to Michigan for Christmas this year which is poopey as hell. I missed her horribly. So I am closing with a quote from a great philosopher, Winnie the Pooh:

“Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh," he whispered.

"Yes, Piglet?"

"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, "I just wanted to be sure of you."”

Thinking

2009-12-16T17:26:00.003-05:00

When The Man first lost his job I offered to sell my soul and apply for a state job in my field. A couple of the counties WAAAAAY Up North were hiring and I felt that with my experience I could get hired. State workers make double what I do and it appears that they do half of the work. He said that he would support my decision however while he had absolutely no doubt in his mind that I could do the job he was concerned that I couldn't handle not being able to see him everyday. Now keep in mind he was not being all macho and conceited with that statement. He was stating the truth.

I really don't do well when I can't see him everyday. I hate not being able to get a hug or hold his hand or snuggle with him before we go to sleep. I feel incomplete and my day gets all wonky.

Yep we have only been married for two years but I already can't picture my life before having the Ohio Boy.

I really do like this marriage gig.

Whooo

2009-11-30T19:01:00.001-05:00

The Man's first day of WORK was today!!!
He was laid off Feb 18
His next day of work Nov 30

Oye I do love Michigan but for the love of the Bald Headed Baby Jesus this economy is for the birds!!

Monthly Meeting

2009-11-12T22:57:00.002-05:00

I had a staff meeting for my second job today. We had to introduce ourselves and share a challenging time with the newbies. I shared one funny challenging time and one serious challenging time. I shall share my funny one here:-)
The non-profit that I work for is housed in a huge old house that is very typical in this college town that shall be known as A2. Now in A2 we have an unusual mix of people. You have the well educated comfortable to some serious money people to the I want to save the world from the evil of capitalism one hairy armpit at a time people. I tend to work with the second group because I shall be known as someone who loves children more than I love making a decent wage:-) In case you are wondering yes I was the only one there tonight wearing make-up, earrings and carrying a purse that I can't smoke when I am done using it.

On to my story: I HATE basements with a fiery passion. I will turn on every light in the house when I have to go down to our basement and that drives The Man batty. In fact, the only request I have for the finished basement project we have going is that I want lots of lights down there. The shelter that I work with is a three story home not including the basement. Part of the assigned chore for the overnighters is doing the laundry. The shelter part of the house is on the top floor. The basement is THREE flights of steps and the laundry machines are in the VERY BACK WHERE THEY USED TO KEEP THE COAL. Yeah the house is that old. When I work I have EVERY light on in the house and yes I am aware that I am wasting energy however it is a well known fact that the boogey man does not like light! The chick that comes in on Saturday morning is quite the earth mother type and she will turn off all of the lights before coming upstairs and she will call out without even seeing me "Good Morning Duchess" because apparently I am the only one that is that much of a dork to waste that much energy because of a mythical creature who does exist! I shared this "challenging" time with my co-workers and the chick sitting next to me told that I don't have to worry about being scared because there are light orbs in our shelter and they will protect me. Another known fact apparently is that light orbs are usually friendly spirits who look after us.

How many of you would like to bet on the chance of me EVER working at the shelter overnight again?

Drama

2009-11-11T18:52:00.002-05:00

My mommakins is back in her apartment! She left rehab today:-)
Tomorrow I have a staff meeting for my second job and then supervision. I love that I have to have supervision for a one shift a week job that the kids are usually asleep for anyway.

So I had a nasty court date yesterday. One of my cases involves a same sex couple whose first foster placement was a doozy. We knew the kids were pretty abused however the mother in effort to gain the sympathy of the court provided even more information regarding the abuse and her complete ignorance of what was going on with any of the three children. This same birth mother stalked the foster parents, followed them home, had mail sent to their home and showed up at their office to just name a few things that these foster parents have endured. Anyhoo the foster parents believe that we knew the extent of the abuse and we withheld information. We didn't know the details and we did share our thoughts that we just knew the bare surface of what the kids had gone through but no the foster parents blame us. Our relationship with these people are not good and everything we do is wrong and we are against them etc. They are now adopting two of the three children and they are against the other foster parent who is adopting the other child even though they didn't want the second child just the oldest and youngest. Our last court date we had a substitute referee (referees are attorneys and they are below Judges. They can't "order" like a judge they can "recommend") who stated on record that she felt that there is a conspiracy against these foster parents and the state is in on it and it even got worse as the hearing went on. Mind you this is all on record. Our agency filed an official compliant against this referee. This referee has a reputation of not really understanding the law and just being wiley niley on what she "recommends". So I was dreading this court date because the referee had "recommended" that I have the adoption completely finished by this court date which is completely impossible and you would think that a referee with over 20 years experience would know that but yep she did indeed "recommend" this nonsense. Moving on with my rambling, I get to court and the foster parents are already there and they say that we were moved to another court room. Odd. Anyway I find the other court room and it is the head referee's court room. Our case was moved to another docket until the regular referee returns. Ok I get that and then one of the attorneys sitting next to me asks if I know why we were moved and I shook my head. The attorney said that the substitute referee was terminated!! The attorney stated that the referee finally ticked off the wrong person. I asked for details and we were not the only agency that had complained about her. She was really a dangerous person to have on the stand because even though they only recommend the Judge that signs off on the recommendation which turns it into an order relies on the referee to not be a nut case!

See you all should become social workers! We lead exciting lives:-)

WOW

2009-11-08T11:15:00.004-05:00

I last posted in July?!?! Really?

Hmm that is just sad very very sad but life has been crazy and not in the good way.

My mom is really struggling with her health and now it looks like she is moving in with us early next year. She has to have a shunt put in to help her not retain so much fluid (she has liver problems and her stomach is always extended which makes it hard for her to move about) and one of the side effects of this procedure is heightened confusion so The Man and I discussed it and she is moving in. We have a three bedroom house and she will have the bedroom next to the bathroom and we are going to finish the basement to increase our living space.

The Man had a CAD test which followed an interview so we are hopeful. The job is only a contract position but it will put a bit more experience on his resume and we keep hearing that the economy is picking up so lets keep our fingers crossed:-)

We have been married two years and Lord it has been quite the adventure. I would not change a minute of it though because the challenges are making us and our relationship stronger. Well that is what I am telling myself at least:-)

Hey another blogger friend got married! Check out: mylifeasacrazycatlady.blogspot.com
She was another beautiful bride.

How do you do those link things where you can just click on the text and it magically takes you where you need to go?

I promise to try to be a better blogger:-)

An Update

2009-07-29T20:24:00.004-04:00

Sorry, sorry! I have been reading all of my blogs but I have been so tired lately I haven't had the energy to update my own blog.

The Man is still looking for a job however K-Pooh just gave him a lead so we, of course, jumped on it. Please cross your fingers, toes and send up some serious prayers please. I do appreciate it and so does The Man.

I just got Consent on a competing party adoption and it made my day! The state worker assigned to the case was putting up numerous road blocks because she wanted the foster parent of the siblings to adopt the baby even though the older siblings are all sexually acting out on each other and the two younger brothers refuse to speak to the older brother because he scares them. The oldest sibling is 12 and the youngest is 2. Yeah good idea to place a non mobile baby with significant developmental delays in that home. OY!

The Mommakins retired on July 1. Her health is absolute rubbish and I terrified when she doesn't answer a text within an hour of me sending it. I am constantly in contact with her doctors to arrange the appointments and tests and what have you. The Man is the one that has to take her to the majority of her appointments since he is not working yet so at least that is helpful. It will be a struggle to schedule her appointments when he does get a job because he won't be able to take any time off but we will manage something when that time comes. She can at least take her short bus to two of her doctors. She hates it but if she can get there I can pick her up after work.

So two weeks ago I met The Man and Mommakins at the doctor. I placed my planner, also known as MY LIFE thank you very much, in the pocket of the wheelchair. That is where I left the darn thing! I didn't even realize it until Oatmeally called me on Saturday asking me a question. I panicked!!! I called the hospital and there was nothing in the lost and found and the medical building was closed until 7:00 am Monday morning. Me and my chubby bum was at the medical building at 7:03 on Monday morning. It wasn't in the medical building so I walked over to the hospital and as I approached the information desk a beam of sunshine hit my beautiful planner. It was a glorious sight and as I reached the desk a choir of angels started to sing!!! It was kind of funny because I have my business card and my name plastered all over the planner and no one thought to open it and call one of my numerous numbers. Maybe they would have if I hadn't claimed it so fast. Anyhoo my baby is back where she belongs and I know where I am supposed to be:-)

Did I ever tell you that my planner is color coded? It is and I am not ashamed to admit it!! I would take a picture but I haven't figure out how to alter photos yet and I have it coded by clients too.
My system? Why yes I will share it with you:-)
Pink is personal
Orange is court
Green is home visits
Blue is meetings
Yellow is my second job

I have an alien nation setting up camp on my nose and being the goofball that I am I had The Man take a picture of it and I sent it to BunnyButt. You need friends that you can do that to and she is looking forward to performing a minor operation on Saturday when I see her to celebrate Oatmeally's birthday.

This no job thing is getting on The Man's nerves so I have been praying very hard that he finds something soonest. Lately I swear I have been hearing "Around the corner". So me being me I feel that this could mean one of three things:
1. I am experiencing positive symptoms of schizophrenia
2. G-d is telling me chill out and just trust Him
3. The Man is getting a job at Dairy Dan's

I think that is it for today my loves:-)
Hugs:-)

By the way: CONGRATULATIONS TO MS. MINDLESS!!! She got married last Saturday and I can't wait to see the wedding pictures:-)

A Goober is not at her Gooberiness without an Oatmeally

2009-06-27T14:35:00.002-04:00

I missed her so much!

Happy Father's Day Stinky !!!!!!!

2009-06-21T11:19:00.002-04:00

So this is my Dad AKA Stinky AKA Stinky McGoo. We have had our days but in the end I will always be a daddy's girl!

My relationship with my father has its highs and lows but no matter how much my stepmonster tries to interfere we are still close. So even though she made him late for my wedding he still walked me down that aisle!

Thoughts

2009-05-24T12:45:00.002-04:00

I had this post in my head for a while so here it goes.

My Godson is graduating from high school in less than two weeks. He was accepted to Westpoint and the entire family is just bursting with pride. When I told a co-worker that he was going to Westpoint she asked me if I was ok with that and when I looked at her with a blank look on my face she clarified her statement by adding "you know him going into the military?". I stated that OF COURSE I was proud and a lot of my family is/was in the military in this country and in Mexico. Her next comment was "Oh well I don't support the military" My reply was that my Godson would protect her right not to support the military and the right to publicly state that without fear of retribution. It was her turn to look at me blankly.

Oy Vey!

I am scared and worried that he is joining at a time when we are at war and half the world hates us but still expect us to send money to help them. His older brother is a MP and I worry about him too.

My Godson is so handsome and so smart and I have so many memories of him that make me smile on my worst days.

His Godfather and I shopping for his baptism outfit.
Dressing him and realizing that his baptism socks would probably fit him at his Communion:-)
Walking into the living room and having him thank me for not letting him go to Hell. His brother explained that I was the only person capable of keeping him out of Hell---the wisdom of a 5 year old:-)
Taking him to the Van Gogh exhibit at the DIA
Watching him dance at his Aunt Nette's wedding
Seeing him in a tux for my wedding
Knowing that my Godson walked my mom down the aisle at my wedding--didn't actually see it but we have pictures:-)
Hearing that he told my mom to just hang on he would get her down the aisle just fine-she was nervous and she has been unsteady on her feet since she broke her leg in 2005.

Yes I am proud of him and when he goes to Westpoint I will be praying harder than I have ever prayed in my entire life.

Anyone still reading this??

2009-05-14T21:33:00.002-04:00

So life has been busy lately. The Man is still looking for a job and my job is kicking it up a notch. My cases are all moving and I am feeling a bit overwhelmed.

I now have a competing party adoption with a completely lovely FP and a completely unsuitable grandmother. The grandmother was in the home when the abuse occurred and she keeps referring to the abuse as "stress" "an incident" and "not a big deal". This State refers to the abuse as "a felony" and his rights were terminated. His daughter found a pretty Easter dress that she didn't buy because she didn't want anyone to see her scars. An 8 year old has body issues because of her scars....lovely.

I have a referee who thinks that she controls the world as we know it and she is ordering the near impossible of all the workers that appear in her courtroom. The AG told me that they all draw straws when the referee assignment comes up.

Today I got lost on my way back to the office from a visit. I ended up going into a shady neighborhood and when I got to a stop sign I paused a bit longer to try to get my bearings. As I was trying to figure out how to get back to work I turned my head and saw a man coming toward my car in a dead run. I completely panicked and hit the gas. I think I may have taken the turn on two wheels:-) I called The Man completely shaken and he talked to me as I actually found my way to work.

I am going to start to carry a little notebook around because I get great blogging ideas during the day and then they go away when I can actually post:-(

Can we talk?

2009-04-06T21:38:00.002-04:00

Today at work I was emailing my friends to express my utter disgust with this snow nonsense when one of them told me to call him because we had to talk. Oddly when I read the email I got a sick feeling in my stomach. The email just looked bad which is silly since it didn't look any different from the other emails I had received today.
I called him and he told me that one of my "friends" husband had to tried to commit suicide last Thursday. He took a cocktail of over the counter and prescription medication with a cough medicine chaser (a couple of bottles). He was in a medically induced coma and they were going to try to bring him out in a couple of days. They don't know what type of damage he had done but they were fearing his liver and kidney functioning may be permanently harmed and they have no idea what type of brain damage they are looking at until he wakes up.

I put friend in quotes for a reason. I have not spoken to his wife in close to two years. Before the wedding I dragged Oatmeally to their house to hear a presentation. The presentation turned out to be an A*WAY join our cult dealio. Now I joke that Blondie and Scrapbook Girl belong to the scrapbooking cult but I truly believe that A*WAY is a real cult. Anyhoo I listened to the information and then I talked to The Man about it and he raised some good points and we decided not to join even to the point that we didn't shop in her store. This angered the wife and she wanted to know why The Man was CONTROLLING me and it would only get worse when we got married. Now to join it would have been a chunk of change and we were saving for the wedding and we didn't need anymore surprises concerning our wedding budget. So the phone calls started being further and further apart to the point that when it came time to do the wedding list she and her husband were not on it.

I felt odd calling her today but I did because this type of event is bigger than a silly argument. I left a message and I will try again a few days. It is completely up to her to call but I just wanted to let her know if she needs me I am still here for her. I don't think I will go to the hospital because well given the circumstances and where our friendship is I feel that me showing up may cause more damage than do any good.

Anyway if you are praying tonight feel free to throw out a prayer for him. I have no idea what drove him to the point that he thought ending his life was a good option but he does have a wife that loves him more than anything.

Hugs

My Computer is BACK!!!!

2009-04-05T15:51:00.002-04:00

I promise to post something soon but we have been busy and work is crazy!!
Updates:
The Man is still unemployed but if any of you know a company who needs an awesome mechanical engineer feel free to contact me:-)
I finalized an adoption last Friday and it was AWESOME!!

Happy Easter loves!!

Free Personal signatures - cool!

2009-03-23T20:21:00.001-04:00

TEXTAREA_ID

Birthday Reminders

2009-02-28T01:17:00.003-05:00

I have my Yahoo calendar set up to send me birthday reminders. I swear I have the worst memory for birthdays especially in October since some of my favorite people are all bunched up within the first few days and I feel like a complete fluffhead when I call Scrapbook Girl on K-Poohs birthday or vice versa=) I also write in my planner all of my friends birthdays and I have a Vera Bradley birthday reminder book that is quite nifty. So I do try to be organized not that it works all the time:-(

Anyhoo is it odd that I still write in my grandma's birthday even though she died when I was 12?

Lent

2009-02-27T07:55:00.004-05:00

We all know that I went to a Catholic grade school and high school and Lent was a big thing that was discussed in almost every class. Really.
Religion class= well obviously
History class= historical facts about buying trends in large Catholic towns during Lent
Science class= I know it was covered heck if I can remember how
English class= An essay on why you gave up what you did
See?

Anyhoo I had a religion teacher in 6th grade who was hell on wheels. She also taught history and until 6th grade I loved both of those classes. I also loved them after 6th grade. During 6th grade? Umm not so much. I seriously think that woman was the poster child for critics of the Church. She was so militant in her faith that she scared the tar right out of us. She gave up EVERYTHING for Lent. Soda, candy, laughing (not that she was a load of fun on a good day), TV, etc.. If she saw you drink something other than water she gave you such a look of disgust and if she saw you laughing with your friends at recess (which she felt was a sin during Lent and she wouldn't take out her homeroom class so the 7th grade teacher would have two classes)she would launch into a lecture about how if we were good Catholics we would not be LAUGHING during Lent. During Lent she was a miserable person and Religion class was one long sermon complete with her red face and us thinking that God wants us to be miserable for at least 40 days and dear God why wasn't I born into a Jewish family??? She lasted one looooooong year and then she left to teach at a prison or something. Actually I had her again in high school and that just sucked too but at least I didn't cry in class. In all fairness she was really smart and in history class she had a lot of fun and interesting facts to share and if she just forgot that she was angry and bitter she was borderline human.

So to my point? I have hated Lent from 6th grade to oh about just recently. I love my faith and I love Advent, Christmas, Triduum, Easter and Ordinary time but Lent? Lets just skip it shall we? Over the past couple of years I have made an effort to really listen to the readings during Mass and trying to get rid of the distaste that I have had regarding this season since I was 12 years old. So this year I am really trying to do my daily reading and praying and take seriously what I decided to do for Lent. I didn't give up anything because I really don't think that God cares if I eat pizza or drink my Diet Coke/Pepsi.

I decided to work on being patient with my mother.

Which may have me wondering why I wasn't born into a Jewish family by day 25 but at least I am trying:-)

Hugs

Yeah so ummm HI there!

2009-02-19T14:20:00.002-05:00

My life is a mess so what do I do? I BLOG about it of course:-)
So yeah The Man and I are making plans and circling the wagon. I think we will be ok for a year and then? Well let's hope there is not a "then" mmmkay?
I am so lucky to have the posse that I have to send me jokes and purses and make silly comments about my status on FB ( the new yuppy crack).

Yesterday I was talking to a friend and she made the comment that I will have to tighten the shoelaces a bit now and I replied "yeah since The Man and I have such an extravagant life?? She replied well you always talk about the new sweaters you bought and I just cut her off right there. I was not in the mood to hear how my ability to find sweaters on clearance (ten bucks peeps) will be the end of our financial lives. Yes I know the Target trips will have to become a monthly or every other month thing now and I will not be checking out TJMax whenever I am around that part of Livonia but really did you find it necessary to point that out to me on the day my husband lost his job??? Really you think I am that slow that I was not aware of that small fact?!?! Yes I realize I might just be a bit sensitive right now and the emotions were right on top yesterday but all I wanted was some support and I felt that she chose to rub salt in the wound.

Oy

So K-pooh is working on winning the lottery and then all of our problems will be solved. I think she may even buy a ticket this week as the first step of her grand plan. I will keep you all posted on our stimulus plan:-)

Hugs:-)

Well at least we know...

2009-02-18T15:19:00.002-05:00

He at least got some bit of a severance package and we have health care through my job. The way they handled this whole situation sucks however we must move forward now.
I am positive with his skills and experience he will find something soon. If we have to move out of Michigan then we have to move out of Michigan. We are married and we are a team and we will get through this together.

But damn this sucks.

The ax fell

2009-02-18T13:28:00.000-05:00

We are now a single income home. We will get through this!

Bleck, Blah, Yeesh

2009-02-15T17:15:00.002-05:00

Bunny Butt has reminded me that I need to update my blog and load pictures however I don't have it in me right now. The Man may or may not find out if he has a job this week. Ironically it's National Engineers Week. Ha flipping ha.

They announced layoffs in December and they said it would happen the first part of February. It's now the third week and there a bazillion rumors flying around however nothing concrete has happened. More people than they expected took the buy out and that changed their plans which ok whatever but for the love of G-d you know there are people who are on pins and needles waiting to find out what is happening to their jobs.

At this point I just want to know one way or another what is going on. We have made plans and if we are careful we will be ok for a year if The Man does lose his job. Until we know for sure I am just not in the mood to blog:-(

Hugs

Still here

2009-02-02T18:47:00.001-05:00

The Man came home today with the news that they have started laying off people this week.
Lovely
Send prayers PLEASE!

Ok we need to send prayers to Harper NOW!!

2009-01-17T01:02:00.002-05:00

I sometimes feel like I know the women behind the blogs that I read. I get excited when one of them gets engaged or when one of them gets pregnant. I worry with them over jobs and life's disappointments just like I do with my "real" friends. They are just friends I have not met in person yet:-) So this is why I need you all to pray for Kelly and Baby Harper. I have followed Kelly through her pregnancy since she announced it on her blog. I looked forward to the baby updates and I was excited right along with her when she announced it was a girl. Today she gave birth to Miss Harper and things are not looking too positive right now. She lost a lot of blood durig the delivery and it appears from another blog that Harper was flown to a Children's Hospital because of breathing issues. Kelly's blog is: www.kellyskornerblog.com

Please pray for her and Harper.
Hugs

Please pray for this family

2009-01-15T15:46:00.002-05:00

aplacecalledsimplicity.blogspot.com

Excitement!

2009-01-15T15:29:00.002-05:00

So I told you that The Man may lose his job in Feb. I am taking it as a good sign that he was just assigned a co-workers projects. That co-worker opted to take the buy out.

I am excited that Vera Bradley has announced their new colors for Spring 2009! Whoo Hoo!!!
Check them out ladies:-)
Hugs,

Things are looking up!

2009-01-13T19:19:00.002-05:00

I no longer have peanut butter in my engagement ring!
Small steps people.
Small steps:-)

Hugs

Its been an odd week

2009-01-11T15:37:00.002-05:00

This week seriously felt like two weeks were jammed into one regular week.

Oh the work front:
I have to write child evaluations for each of my kids. This report is given to the prospective adoptive parent to read so they can get a bigger picture of what type of environment the child came from, it includes the birth family history and the reasons why the child entered foster care in the first place. This week I worked on one report for the entire week. It took me that long because the descriptions of the abuse that her four siblings went through was too much for me to focus on for more than an hour or so at a time. Seriously, I couldn't just sit down and write because I found myself getting upset just reading it. The youngest child was less than one when she was removed and there were signs of sexual and physical abuse on her and I don't even want to discuss the three older boys.

On the dream front:
I had two dreams that I remembered this week. Don't worry this won't turn into my dream journal or anything crazy like that:-) But they were nice dreams.
A bit of a background story for this dream: Oatmeally lived in a house that was held together with spit, bubblegum and duct tape. Seriously it was falling apart around her and the boys. It needed a new roof and poor Oatmeally thought that if she got a bunch of our friends together that we could replace it. Hmmm lets just think about this for a minute shall we? I am terrified of heights and none of us are really what you would call "handy". So thankfully this idea was never played out in real life. Anyway the dream....
Neil was fixing the roof on the old house which was somehow on her new house. He was tan and happy. He was on the ladder smoking and mumbling under his breath because Tina and I kept handing him the wrong tools. I woke up feeling content that he was where he should be and he was at peace.

Second dream....
I was at Scrapbook Girls parent's house and her mom was laughing and talking. But she didn't look like I knew her. She looked younger like Scrapbook Girls age. Scrapbook Girl, her sister and brother were there and her dad was cooking. A bunch of our friends were there too. She was laughing with her kids about some little dog that kept running away. It was a sunny day and it just felt like everyone was happy and life was good. I woke up feeling happy that morning too.

On the house front:
Dear God we have four cats!

I really hope this week is just a normal week:-)

Hugs

Sitting at home alone with the zoo

2009-01-06T18:41:00.004-05:00

I am home alone tonight, The Man went to his friend's house to play board games so I am enjoying my down time. Work has been super busy with trying to get my visits in before the end of the month between snow flurries.

My new addiction is Face Book. I even got The Man on face book:-) Today a friend from grade school sent me a friend request. I was so excited!

Can I get more random??

Odd things

2009-01-04T12:14:00.003-05:00

Odd ramblings:

--I live in Michigan. I have only lived in Michigan and the only person I know who lives in/around New York is The Cousin. So why do I read the wedding announcements in the NY Times every week? I even tear up when the back story is good.

Why you sometimes should forget you're a social worker when you are in Church:
--So on New Years Eve we were in Church. The priest was talking about Joseph being Jesus' foster father during the homily. I leaned over to The Man and said actually he was more like his adoptive father because he gave Jesus his last name and legally foster parents can not change a foster child's name. Also I was thinking to myself he was married to Mary so Jesus was not removed from a birth parent's care due to neglect or abuse so really Joseph was his adoptive parent.

-- We sang "What child is this" I barely caught myself before I sang "Whose child is this"

Yet another reason why The Duchess and The Man are big saps:

-- We now have 4 FOUR cats. Why? My friend got pregnant and her husband made her get rid of the cats so we took all three of them. Our little house is now home to:
The Man
Duchess
Osiris (The Man's big crabby cat)
Loki ( MY dog who is adorable in every way)
Thea (small cat big attitude)
Lucina (white cat with black spots)
Skif (male tiger striped cat, we think, since he walked in the house and promptly disappeared)

Why the odd names? We tried to name the cats after gods of different mythologies. Osiris is the Egyptian god of the dead. Loki is the Norse god of mischief. Thea is the Greek Titan goddess of heavenly light. Lucina is the Roman goddess of childbirth. We couldn't find a good god name for Skif so he is named after a character in the Mercedes Lackey Valdemar series of books. He is a Herald who is a bit mischievous.

Poop

2009-01-02T18:29:00.001-05:00

I have typed an entry three times and I lost it three times.
Going to try again tomorrow.
Now?
I am shaking an angry fist and going to make something for dinner.
Bleck!

2008

2009-01-01T18:25:00.002-05:00

Wow 2008 was not the best year but it wasn't the worst either.

I started this year in grad school counting down the days until I graduated.
I ended the year being dismissed for C's.

I started this year employed at a non profit full time.
I was told that I couldn't go to school and work. So I quit and found a part time job.
I ended the year with a part time job and a full time job at two more non-profits.

Those were the two main changes at Casa de Hispanic-German last name. In the grand scheme of things we were blessed. It could have been much worse.

My bestest friend lost her little brother.
ScrapbookGirl lost her momma.
K-Poohs friend lost her battle with cancer leaving a beautiful little girl behind.

2009 starts with The Man wondering if he will have a job after February. The economy is still uncertain but at least I have a full time job so if the worst happens at least we won't be in a lake without a paddle, ya know?

So even though we have the possible job loss looming in front of us we are starting 2009 with hope that it will be better than 2008.

Besides 2009 is the year that we have decided to go gun-ho on the baby project. The Chinese calendar may say it's the year of the ox but here in Casa de Hispanic-German last name its the year of the Baby.

I hope all of you lovely readers have a Blessed and Happy 2009.
I truly love you all!

MERRY CHRISTMAS

2008-12-24T22:20:00.002-05:00

The cousin is coming!!
The cousin is coming!!!
Whoo hooo
WAIT!!
WRONG PERSON.....
SMART GIRL IS COMING!!!
SMART GIRL IS COMING!!!!
YAYAYAYAYAY
WAIT, still not right.
Give me a minute.....
Oh yeah...
SANTA IS COMING!!
SANTA IS COMING!!!!!!
PERFECT:-)

Have a very Merry Christmas:-)

Hello!

2008-12-14T15:27:00.004-05:00

I finally sent out the Pay It Forward gifts. I am so sorry it took me a million years to send it but as you can tell from last entries and the lack of posting life at Casa de TheMan and Duchess has been crazy, sad, busy and just KRAZEE!

Few things that I have not shared:

My Mac is broken. We need to replace the back light which we will do after Christmas.

I lost my cell phone. I lost it at home. It was on vibrate. The power has died. Yeah that has been a bowl of cherries looking for it. Oatmeally's step-father gave me his Razr which is AWESOME. However I don't have my contacts which stinks on many levels.

The Man may be laid off in Feb. Don't EVEN get me started on the "bailout" which is NOT just for Detroit which is how some chuckleheads in congress is portraying it because guess what?!?! My husband does not work for any of the Big Three but if they close he is out of a job. THIS IS NOT MAKING ME HAPPY!!

So send prayers that The Man keeps his job and somehow the car companies stay open and this economy turns around. I didn't vote for the president elect but I am praying that he can somehow do something for this financial mess.

Pictures later my loves

Prayers again

2008-11-25T20:29:00.003-05:00

One day I will have a happy post.
ScrapBookGirl's mommakins needs prayers and warm fuzzy thoughts. She is in ICU and ScrapBookGirl is heading up to the hospital to be with her.

Neil

2008-11-14T16:08:00.004-05:00

Well friends, God does indeed answer our prayers but sometimes its not the answer we so desperately want to hear.
Neil left us sometime after midnight last night.

I was there for the Last Rites and it was beautiful. He was surrounded by his family and loved ones. You could actually feel the love in the room. There was sadness, there were tears but there was so much love.

Neil was
A son
A little brother who was so protective of his big sister
An uncle to two boys who adored him
A grandson
A nephew
A cousin
A friend

He would come over to Oatmeally's to fix something in the house and visit with the boys. Neil would ask Oatmeally if she did this or that to whatever and she would give him a blank look. He would just shake his head and mumble and she would ask how would she know to do this or that. He would just mumble some more and fix it.

He was tall and lanky and quiet and he had a heart bigger than anyone I know. If you were loved by him all you had to do was call him and he would be there.

He loved video games. One time when I spent the night at their house in high school he tried to teach me how to play one of his games. I am hopeless at video games. Sadly I have trouble remembering which little character I am supposed to be controlling. He just looked at me and mumbled as he took the controller and played both parts.

He was good at fixing things and working with his hands.

He went camping with his nephews.
He went on family vacations and hung out with his cousins and Lord that family is its own tribe. Neil towered over his grandmother and it was cute to see him hug her without smooching her.

He was a good man.
He was loved.
He will be missed.

Helpless

2008-11-11T21:08:00.002-05:00

I am feeling helpless right now. My Oatmeally's brother is not doing well at all. The doctor told their mom that she needed to make a decision. THE DECISION. The decision that no one wants to make let alone a parent. My Oatmeally is being strong for her mommakins and I am desperately trying to be there for her but crap this sucks.
He is only in his early 30's.
His nephews adore him.
This should never had happened.

Keep praying. Please.

Please send prayers

2008-11-08T14:49:00.002-05:00

Oatmeally's brother was in a pretty serious car accident. I don't have any details but I do know the brain surgeon could not say more than "his prognosis at this time is undeterminable".
I am heading to the hospital before I go into work tonight to be with Oatmeally and her family.

Send prayers please.

Someone hand me a soapbox please.

2008-11-04T17:30:00.002-05:00

Ok here I go.
VOTE PEOPLE!! I realize this is a bit late but do you realize what how huge the right to vote is? The majority of my readers are women, excluding the Ohio Boys and my father in law who doesn't actually read it but listens to mother in law read it to him sometimes, and in some nasty parts of this world we do not have the right to vote.
In some parts of the world:
We are considered property
Its against the law to educate a woman
Its against the law to show your face in public
We can't hold jobs
We are given up for adoption because its better to have sons
We are not "allowed"" to have an opinion that differs from our husbands.

I am a minority
I am a woman
I have a college degree
I have opinions different from my husband
I practice my faith freely
On my way to Church I pass many churches of different faiths and we are all allowed to believe as we see fit.
I have friends that are male, female. Catholic, Protestant, Jewish, White, Black and Hispanic
I married the man that I love with all of my heart and who my parents adore. If they didn't, I would have still married him because I can make my own choices.
I take these blessings as a right because I am American.

So yes this country is not perfect. We have our problems. But at the end of the day where else would you rather live?
So VOTE!!!! BE HEARD!! BE COUNTED!!

YAY my FIRST AWARD!!

2008-11-02T15:50:00.002-05:00

Business first people: I have decided to send TWO (ok only two commented but pretend that actual bloggers read my blog, please??) very special bloggers my PAY IT FORWARD something-something:-)

If I was all that and a bag of chips I would be able to link to them but we all know I lack such coolness so look to your right and down ladies------->
MAGGIE WALKS
and
MISADVENTURES OF A NEWLYWED

You will receive a little gift in the mail hopefully by this weekend:-) Just remember to do a PAY IT FORWARD on your blog.

Umm yeah so Maggie, who by the way is a real-life friend of K-Pooh, awarded me my first award and now I have to think of 6 more random things about me!

Here I go:

1. I twirl my hair around my finger and rub it when I am nervous or taking a test. So during finals? My right side of my head has a definite wave and the left side is flatter than flat since I am left handed.

2. I could possibly win if there is ever a TV show called "So you think you can dance and sing in your car". That is the only time I will sing since I can't carry a tune or dance if my life depended on it.

3. I always think of K-Pooh when Coolio's "Gangsta Paradise" comes on. Why? Because one day when we were going back to school from lunch it came on so we drove around the school which is located in the whitest non gangsta place in our county singing at the top of our lungs. Yep one really white chick and one Latina in a white pickup singing about not knowing if we were "gonna make it to 22"

4. I used to be really liberal before I became a social worker and a really practicing Catholic. I was quite the C and E Catholic before 9-11 then I started to actually practice so there you go. Also I work with the people who we are supposedly helping with these programs and ya know what? We are teaching generations that nope don't have to take responsibility for your actions because its the governments fault you are a druggie who despite being given job training, financial assistance for rent and free food for your children and free rehab you still spent it on drugs and lost everything AGAIN.

5.If you are Catholic you know what I mean: During the Prayers of the Faithful there is always the opportunity to pray for your personal intention and I never have enough time to get all my prayers in. So I miss the next intention and then feel guilty for not knowing what was said.

6. I can't watch movies where animals get hurt or children. Adults? No problem but I even worry about the child actors emotional well being if they appear in a horror movie. In Gladiators there is a dog in the first scene of the movie and you never see him again. I still wonder where he went and did he survive the battle.

I tag everyone on my blog roll because, once again, I can't link:-)

Hello!

2008-10-28T20:03:00.003-04:00

We went to oHIo this weekend for The Man's best friends Halloween party....did you follow that?? Anyhoo it was a great party. It was a lot smaller than previous years but it was a good mix of people.

Work is getting better. I turned in four reports today. GO DUCHESS!! Tomorrow I have to go on a home visit. ARGH!

The Man is on a business trip, he left this morning and he will be back tomorrow night. I miss him. Sad I know but I hate sleeping alone now.

So I am definitely going to get a new work bag from VB if they still have it in stock. VB is retiring my favorite pattern Pink Elephants and I want the Bowler bag and the top zip tote. So that is my mission for this weekend.

I won a "Play it Forward" from BFF's. If I was cool enough I could link it but we all know I am lacking in the cool bloggy arena but she is on my blog roll.....LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT LOVELY READERS----->
I LOVE my CD and thank you very very much:-D
So to keep this going on and on I will send the third person to leave a comment a little something-something. You do have to have a blog to win because you will have to do this on your blog:-)

If I find that I only have one blog reader then that person will win it.

Another day at the mine

2008-10-23T20:30:00.003-04:00

Today was a good day. I had court in the morning and then we went to my favorite sub shop that The Man doesn't like to go to so I tend to drag friends there.
Court was good. I saw my favorite AG who is pregnant and got married a day before me. BLECK
I had my first crazy person call me today and now I feel like I am back in the field. This woman called my supervisor and told her that she was moving to Nevada and she told me South Carolina and her other worker Florida. Hmmmm

Now I have to paint my nails and change purses:-)
Tomorrow is causal day and I am way too excited.

New Girl on the Block

2008-10-22T20:38:00.003-04:00

I really don't like being the new girl on the block. I just hate feeling like I have to be "on" every second of the day and the constant feeling of having to prove myself is a bit tiring. At my previous job I knew where everything was and which form to use and how my supervisor wanted something done. Here I know nothing. I am not privy to the little inside jokes and everyone seems more serious than at my previous job. I have been talking to another adoption worker, there are 3 in my department counting me, and the chick across from me but eh I don't have a JT here or a Ruthie or a BlondieDee or a Nicole Marie and I miss them. The other adoption worker is nice but she sits across the office and I haven't figured out our phone system so its a chore to look up her extension and by the time I find it the joke is gone. I always thing of writing it down after the fact because I am a quick but a second too later thinker:-)

I know that its a settling in period and soon I will be one of the gang but until then I miss my old agency:-( I keep telling myself that it takes time and just to relax but Oy.

Also? The old agency had a Target a building away. This agency has homeless people and shady fools on the corner:-(

New Job and things I am bitter about

2008-10-21T20:21:00.003-04:00

I started last Monday and I must say its odd working at a really small agency. I am working on getting my desk all set up and case book organized. I finally got my direct number and my email is all set up. I had my first home visit today and K-pooh and I had a blast trying to find the apartment building in a shady part of town. I was talking to her on the phone the entire time I was driving and cursing the Map**** chuckle heads for not realizing that streets in Detroit are one way and they change names depending on what side of the street you are on.

Things I am bitter about:
1. I still can not find my flipping degree WHERE IS IT??? I even went through boxes at my Mommakins apartment and its not there
2. Ok long story a couple of years ago Scrapbook Girl either went to a Tooperware party or had one or something and I couldn't go so she called me and told me that those cereal container things were buy one get one free. I asked her to get me two and she did. They have red tops and they would go beautifully in my red kitchen. So now that I have a house and a need for them I can't find them.
3. Asthma is kicking
4. I am working but I won't get paid for another week BOOOO

Ya know the way my life is going my degree is probably in one of the cereal containers:-P

Just wondering..

2008-10-10T23:19:00.002-04:00

Do you know where your degree is?
I need mine for Monday and I can't find it.
So here is the plan: I need one of my lovely readers to mail me their degree. Yep any of you lovely ladies who graduated with a BS in Psychology over night your degree to me and I will tape over your name, slap on my name and show it to the HR people on Monday. You will it back by Wednesday. Pinkie swear:-)

Thanks and kisses

In other not depressing news...

2008-10-08T10:16:00.002-04:00

I got the adoption specialist job!!
I start Monday and I am making more at this agency than I did at the previous agency:-)
I found out two minutes before The Man found Allie Cat.

R.I.P. Allie Cat 06-92 to 10-08

2008-10-07T18:41:00.003-04:00

Allie was a rescued cat. The lady that we got her from "stole" her from people who kept her chained outside. We were at a cat show and my mom swore up and down that we were leaving without a cat. We walked down this aisle that had cats for sale and we stopped at this lady's booth because she had an interesting display. The lady was holding Allie and my mom was standing next to the her. Allie leaned over and placed her paw on my mom's arm and just looked at her.

We left with Allie.

Allie was a vocal cat and she was clumsy. My mom thought it was fitting when she read an article that said that animals tend to resemble their owners. Allie was my cat and I may be a bit talkative and yes I did break my ankle walking in Keds.

Whenever The Man would come over Allie would jump on his lap and fall asleep after flirting with him. She would lay on his chest purring loudly and rubbing her head on his goatee. She moved in with him before I did:-)

She loved sleeping on me and she would drape herself over my shoulder and just purr and play with my hair. She would hit the dog for just walking by her. She was the smallest of the furry children yet she was the boss!

She would sit on my lap and just stare at me when I was upset about something. If it was a cold night she would crawl into my pillow case to sleep.

She was a good cat and she was a loved cat.

We knew that she was not doing well these last few months and I knew this was coming but damn this really stinks.

Patience is not my middle name!

2008-10-07T10:04:00.002-04:00

I am waiting to hear about a job since the week before last. I have been driving The Man and Oatmeally crazy with my worrying and wondering. I called the agency last Wednesday and again on Monday. No call back. I decided today I would not call back because really? I didn't want to beg for a job. So they called today. I should know by Friday and I am definitely in the running for the job.

Yeah my friends can use a bazillion adjectives to describe me and most of them would be flattering:-) However if any of them tell you that I am patient? They are lying!

ONE YEAR of HAPPY

2008-10-06T09:45:00.004-04:00

The "Good Night" kiss each and every night
Puttering around the house together
The talks
The cuddling
The absolute faith I have in The Man that he will always love me and be there for me no matter what life will throw at us!

The Lows
Our first Christmas
School
Losing my job
Money or lack of

I thank G-d every day that I married The Man!

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The Posse

2008-10-02T13:36:00.003-04:00

What can I say about my posse?

I chose my wedding party carefully. Everyone of those awesome women are special to me in some way.

The Cousin was my Maid of Honor and throughout the years we have had our highs and lows. While last year was the best year of my life so far it was one of her hardest. Yet she was right there beside me as I made the biggest commitment of my life. She has come through for me and I would walk through hell to get to her. The cousin bond is not to be taken lightly:-)

Bridesmaids

Heros wife . She married my older cousin and The Cousin's brother. She made me laugh the whole day of the wedding and the night before. She is sassy and sure of herself and she is an awesome mother to her three boys. She comes from a divorced family too so she can emphasize with me when my parents act goofy.

Oatmeally. Good Lord that woman was dragged on every wedding errand since the Cousin lives in Jerzee. She was my rock and she has talked me down numerous cliffs since the 9th grade.

PastelOne. She is my sister and truly one of the nicest people in this world. I give her crap for surrounding herself with all that is pastel but she had no problem with the red dress and even enjoyed branching out a bit:-)

BunnyButt. She tried on numerous dresses and had many ideas regarding bras and shoes (think pointed boobies and Missy Elliot boots!) She cheered me up when I was drowning with work, school and the wedding.

K-Pooh. Stepped and resolved the great Hair and Make-up conflict of 2007! I called her crying that I was going to have to do my hair myself and good Lord I can't wear a pony tail to my wedding and whine and cheese and whine some more. The next day she had it all organized. Gotta love a woman who has a planner and cell phone and is not afraid to use it.

Scrapbook Girl: She was the email girl. I sent her close to 1,000,000,000,000 emails about the wedding from dresses to shoes to hair and her response? Just let me know what and where you need me and I will be there. Gotta love that:-)

So yeah I couldn't have had the wedding that The Man and I had without everyone of those ladies. For one thing I probably would have slept in even more than I did and I would have missed the whole thing:-D

I am having a day

2008-09-30T19:08:00.004-04:00

But I believe this quote sums it up very nicely.

I would rather have thirty minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special.
Shelby--Steel Magnolia's

I think being married to The Man is going to bring me a lifetime of wonderful and this year? Will be our 30 minutes of nothing special.

Wedding Memories

2008-09-27T15:30:00.002-04:00

Our One Year Anniversary is on October 6th so I think I will try to post some wedding memories.

This is the song that my dad and I danced to:
Artist: Donna Fargo (peak Billboard position # 5 in 1972)
Words and Music by Donna Fargo

Funny face, I love you
Funny face, I need you
My whole world's wrapped up in you

When the road I walk seems all uphill
And the colors in my rainbow turn blue
You kiss the tears away
You smile at me and say
"Funny face (funny face) I love you"

Funny face, I love you
Funny face, I need you
These are the sweetest words I've ever heard
Funny face, don't leave me
Funny face, believe me
My whole world's wrapped up in you

And when I hurt your feelings as I sometimes do
And I say those mean things that we know are not true
You forgive my childish way
You hold me close and say
"Funny face (funny face) I love you"

Funny face, I love you
Funny face, I need you
These are the sweetest words I've ever heard
Funny face, don't leave me
Funny face, believe me
My whole world's wrapped up in you

Funny face, I love you
Funny face, I need you

FADE
These are the sweetest words I've ever heard
Funny face, don't leave me

My parents heard it when I was a baby and Lord I was a funny looking baby. No really, I would not have taken me home. My head was lopsided and smooched in by my left eye and I had PATCHES of hair and I generally looked like I went ten rounds with Tommy Hearns. So yeah I was lucky they brought me home:-)

Hello......

2008-09-27T12:20:00.000-04:00

Alrighty lets see if the color on the signature changed...

Time for a change

2008-09-27T12:15:00.001-04:00

Let me see if all the changes worked:-)

Free Personal signatures - cool!

2008-09-27T11:58:00.001-04:00

TEXTAREA_ID

Personality Test

2008-09-25T17:37:00.001-04:00

This is fun:http://www.41q.com/

My Results:
Your personality type:

Enthusiastic, idealistic and creative. Able to do almost anything that interests them. Great people skills. Need to live life in accordance with their inner values. Excited by new ideas, but bored with details. Open-minded and flexible, with a broad range of interests and abilities.

Careers that could fit you includes:

Actors, journalists, writers, musicians, painters, consultants, psychologists, psychiatrists, entrepreneurs, teachers, counselors, politicans, diplomats, television reporters, marketers, scientists, sales representatives, artists, clergy, public relations, social scientists, social workers.

Interview

2008-09-25T17:29:00.003-04:00

I had an interview today and I think it went really well. I should know by next week if I got the job.
So wish me luck peeps!

In other news it appears that The Man and I have quite the social life this October. We have plans every weekend:-)
I am still working on the office and getting my life switched from school to work. I just want to throw my books out the window but that strikes me as silly and besides they can be good reference books right? RIGHT?? Eh just agree with me:-)

Q & A

2008-09-23T16:42:00.002-04:00

I stole this from southernheaven.blogspot.com

Q's & A's
1. What is in the back seat of your car right now?
DSM-4, My work bag and Loki toys

2. When was the last time you threw up?
Ummm not too long ago

3. What's your favorite curse word?
Fuck a muck, beeyatch.

4. Name 3 people who made you smile today?
My husband The Man, my mom and K-Pooh

5. What were you doing at 8 am this morning?
eating breakfast with my mom

6. What were you doing 30 minutes ago?
yelling at the dog

7. What will you be doing 3 hours from now?
maybe working in the office or nagging The Man!

8. Have you ever been to a strip club?
Yes and its all false advertising!!

9. What is the last thing you said aloud?
"Go around the air conditioning thingee you dumb Mutt Dog"

10. What is the best ice cream flavor?
Cookie Dough

11. What was the last thing you had to drink?
Diet Coke

13. What was the last thing you ate? .
Cottage cheese with Catalina dressing and croutons

14. Have you bought any new clothing items this week?
Not this week oh wait socks. Do socks count? Boring ones

15. When was the last time you ran?
you must be new in these here parts.

16. What's the last sporting event you watched?
Ha just ha!!

18. Who is the last person you emailed? .
K-Pooh

19. Ever go camping?
hee hee these questions are funny

20. Do you have a tan?
I am actually quite pale for a Latina

21. Do you drink your soda from a straw?
Yes when I feel British

22. What did your last IM say?
It was probably the Cousin yelling at me that setting up IM is not that difficult and why am I such a dork

23. Are you someone's best friend?
Hell ya!

24. What are you doing tomorrow?
Working on reports for a grad program that I am no longer in

25. Where is your mom right now?
at home watching an old movie

26. Look to your left, what do you see?
the neighbor getting out of his truck

27. What color is your watch?
silver

28. What do you think of when you think of Australia ?
kangaroos

29. Would you consider plastic surgery?
Yes and Dr. Ray from 90210 will do it

30. What is your birthstone?
diamond

31. Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru?
drive thru

32.How many kids do you want?
ONE

33. Do you have a dog?
Loki a beagle

34. Last person you talked to on the phone?
The Man

35. Have you met anyone famous?
My cousin's friend who just won an Emmy.

36. Any plans today?
Nope

37. How many states have you lived in?
one!

38. Ever go to college?
Yes and I have a BS

39. Where are you right now?
Home

40. Biggest annoyance in your life right now?
School

41. Last song listened to?
"Don't remember

42. Are you allergic to anything?
yep lots of things

43. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time?
Ballet flats all sorts of colors and patterns

44. Are you jealous of anyone?
no

45. Is anyone jealous of you?
hee hee no

46. What time is it?
4:55

47. Do any of your friends have children?
Yes

48. Do you eat healthy?
um no

49. What do you usually do during the day?
eat bon bons while being fanned by cute island boys

50. Do you hate anyone right now?
I intensely dislike certain professors

51. Do you use the word 'hello' daily?
Yes

52. How old will you be turning on your next birthday?
36

53. Have you ever been to Six Flags?
Nope

54. How did you get one of your scars?
Surgery on my neck to remove an enlarged lymph node when I was 5

Fall 08, we need a do-over

2008-09-17T12:01:00.003-04:00

So I am struggling with finding a job
Someone is struggling with possible job loss
Someone else is struggling with boy problems
Mom has to have surgery
May we have a new Fall 08?
Ok Thanks

You with the sad eyes
don't be discouraged
oh I realize
it's hard to take courage
in a world full of people
you can lose sight of it all
and the darkness inside you
can make you fell so small

But I see your true colors
shining through
I see your true colors
and that's why I love you
so don't be afraid to let them show
your true colors
true colors are beautiful
like a rainbow

Show me a smile then
don't be unhappy, can't remember
when I last saw you laughing
if this world makes you crazy
and you've taken all you can bear
you call me up
because you know I'll be there

And I'll see your true colors
shining through
I see your true colors
and that's why I love you
so don't be afraid to let them show
your true colors
true colors are beautiful
like a rainbow

(Cydni Lauper)

Together we can get through these tough times. I just hope they end quickly.

Its been confirmed by a medical professional

2008-09-16T19:28:00.003-04:00

My mom has a screw loose
BWAAHHAHHHHHHH!!!!

No really in 2005 she fell and broke (actually the surgeon said she "shattered") her femur. To fix it they had to put in 10 screws (8 are in her knee) and a plate. Now one of the screws has come loose in her knee and the whole kit and caboodle has to come out.
Next week we will know when the surgery is scheduled and she will be coming home the day after the surgery. I am a bit concerned however I am being positive for her and really? The doctor was a bundle of positive information so I am confident that she will come through this with flying colors.

So there you have it: my momma has a screw loose:-D

Allergies

2008-09-15T19:47:00.003-04:00

Did I ever share that I am allergic to grass? Well I am. When The Man cuts the grass he usually makes sure that I will be out of the house, yeah its that bad.
So today its nice and chilly so I turned off the A/C and opened the windows. I was enjoying the breeze when my yahoo neighbors decided to cut their grass. I have the mother of all headaches and my mood is not pretty.

Why can't I live in a neighborhood where no one cares about their lawn??

GRAD SCHOOL NEWS: My favorite professor is going to ask the Dean if I can reapply for next fall. If I can then we are good. If I can't then counseling at WSU may be the ticket.

Still have not told my dad and I am freaking out by the fact that I have to tell him.
OY

A backup plan

2008-09-08T20:46:00.002-04:00

I found another school to look into if the appeal does not go through. Their entire program is only 18 months long. I picked up the appeal form today. The professor that I am hoping has some words of wisdom for me has not called me back yet so I shall let you know what she has to say.

I just may be a therapist yet!

Posse Power

2008-09-05T09:59:00.003-04:00

I thank G-d everyday for my posse.
Yesterday I thought that all was hopeless and I still feel career-wise it is still hopeless however my life is not all doom and gloom.
I have the Posse.
I emailed the Cousin and she will re-do my resume
I called K-Pooh and Scrapbook Girl and both of them gave support, a shoulder to lean on and then they made me laugh.
Oatmeally listened to me whine and cry and then assured me that I am loved and smart and I have 24 hours to get my head out of my ass.
The Man came home early and let me cry on his chest and then assured me that he loves me and that I am a good writer and everything will be ok.
PosieGirl bought us Chinese for dinner and it was tasty.
My aunt called and told me that loves me and so does my uncle.
I still feel like there is no hope for me ever becoming a therapist but at least I am loved.

The End of a Dream

2008-09-04T13:51:00.001-04:00

We know that I had to quit my full time job because of my desire to become a therapist, right? Well I struggled with two Assessment Classes and I got C's in both of them. I have been dismissed from my program with four classes left to take.
I need to cry and then I will send out the resumes on Monday.

This sucks.

Politics and Religion why the heck not?

2008-09-02T19:55:00.004-04:00

Yes I know its not polite to speak of politics and religion in social settings. However I consider this blog to be part of my world and therefore subject to my way of doing things. They don't call me duchess for nothing! So without stating who I am going to vote for in November let me share a thought or two or three.

1. I do not assume that all African American people are voting for 'Bama and no I do not think all old men are going to vote for McCain.

2. I do not think that McCain thought that women would just vote for him because of his VP choice just like I don't think that Obama thinks all old white guys are going to vote for him because of his VP choice

3. Could she have possibly been picked because of her standing on issues that support McCain's viewpoint and not because she has boobies? I mean maybe she got to be governor because oh I don't know, she is capable and smart.

4. I find it amusing that all of the really snarky comments about Palin are coming from women. Yep all the catty comments about her hair, age and general appearance are being stated by women. Women who normally consider themselves to be feminist bloggers are being downright beeyatchy about Palin. Now if any man made a comment about Palin's appearance how fast would the doo-doo hit the fan?

5. Those same feminist bloggers are also throwing the tomatoes because her daughter is pregnant and is KEEPING the baby. They naturally assume that Palin is making her daughter keep the baby. They go on and on about how her daughter being pregnant is just proof she is not a good parent. However THEIR choice to have abortions were clearly their choice and the only right choice and they hate people judging them for making that choice. Kettle? Hi its teapot how are you doing?

6. Oh I love how they are bringing up the fact that Palin's son has Downs and that is just why abortion should be an option for everyone since why would she keep a baby with Downs? It must because of her freaky belief in God.

Now I may not be the president of Obama's fan club however I respect him as a person and what he has accomplished at such a young age. He appears to be a good father and husband so yes I respect him as a person. Do I agree with him on every issue? No, however, being raised to be a lady ( Yes I can throw down with the best of them and yes I swear and sometimes have a drink or two and yes I can be inappropriate with my humor but I do know the correct way to act) I would never preface any remarks about his standings on issues with any reference to his ethnic background nor would I question his belief in God. So why are the oh so proud to be feminists so quick to throw the rotten veggies at a woman who is working mother just like the majority of them??

Ok six comments. See I told you I am not good with math:-) Sorry I read a lot of blogs, not just the preppy ones listed and I think I may have to stop reading some of them until November.

A missing blogger

2008-09-02T09:56:00.002-04:00

Does anyone know what happened to Can I have my subscription filled? The entire blog is gone and I miss her!!

Ohhhh the troubles I have seen.......

2008-08-25T20:23:00.002-04:00

Sorry about the bad and probably incorrect reference to a song but its been that type of day.
I had to call in because I could not leave the bathroom long enough to get to work.
I had to cancel a fun coffee date with friends because its been that type of day.
Oy

Hey we went to a wedding on Sunday and it was a blast. I now HEART Jewish weddings. There was singing, clapping, circle dancing and wine. What more could I ask for??

Allie and Etsy

2008-08-23T09:41:00.003-04:00

We had a doctor appointment for Allie yesterday. So I hauled my not feeling good self off the couch and we went. Allie does have asthma and she is on an antibiotic. They took her off the other medication because it suppresses her immune system. However that medication helps her breathe but it could have played a part in her getting an upper respiratory infection. They once again suggested the whole take her to a specialist and sell your soul option which we just can't do. For one, I like my soul and second we do not have a lot of surplus moolah at this point. Also I would like to point out she is 16 and I don't think she could be put under safely and the vet even said that she would have concerns with her having the procedure. So we are treating the symptoms to allow her to have a comfortable life but we are not treating the cause. Does that make sense? It is the right decision for our little family at this point and I am okay with that and I think Allie is too since she really hates people poking at her.

Has anyone bought anything from the Etsy site? I found a lot of cute stuff but I have never ordered anything from them.

Let me see if this works

2008-08-22T19:30:00.002-04:00

So I tried to get signature line for this blog because its cute:-)

Edited to add: It worked! It worked! Ok go here: http://www.mylivesignature.com

Choose to create HTML
Then go to Dashboard
Settings
Formatting
Scroll down
Paste in template
Then you are good to go!!
Thank you to:www.sashasays.com

Reason 345,654,123 why The Man is happy he only has one wife or Reason 454,345,098 why I am a goober.

2008-08-21T23:36:00.006-04:00

It has been well documented that I love Sundays now that I am married. We had another lazy day last week and for the most part it was lovely. We were puttering about the house and then it happened.

I took control of the remote.

We watched the SciFi channel and we saw two spookey movies. I was ok with the first. It had Christina Ricci and I LOVE her! So that was fine.

The second movie? Not so much.

It was the Boogey Man 2. Now I have a crippling fear of basements and its to the point that if I have to travel downstairs I turn on every light in the entire house. Not just the basement because if my chubby butt comes flying up those steps I want to know where the animals are so I don't fall thereby giving whatever monster is chasing me an unfair advantage. This is also why I don't travel downstairs wearing heels and a skimpy nightgown. I have seen those cheesy "B" movies*and I watched them like a Marine watching a flim on how to correctly load a gun. To me they were educational. I also don't go on camping trips with friends because lets face it the kooky one always gets killed first or the one with the big boobies. I AM THE KOOKY ONE WITH BIG BOOBIES so to not tempt fate I choose not to camp in the woods in a tent or cabin or anywhere where I feel that a revival of Deliverance could be filmed. Just saying.

Anyway my biggest fear concerning basements is that everyone knows that the Boogey Man lives in basements. Sometimes he vacations under your bed but his main address is the basement.

Back to my point about The Man and marriage.

That movie freaked me out. When we went to bed we watched the Iron Chef and then we turned off the light and tried to go to sleep. Well The Man went to sleep I laid there listening to our house make strange noises that I swear it has never made before in the 10 months I have lived there. I think I dozed off when I heard THE NOISE!

People it sounded like the screen was being ripped. I immediately asked The Man if he heard THE NOISE. He hadn't because as he pointed out oh so patiently that he was almost asleep and he had his earplugs in (not to drown me out we sleep with the fan on and the dog sleeps in the room in his crate and he can be vocal)(at least he tells me its not to drown me out)(sometimes I wonder though). He told me to go to sleep and he would protect me from the Boogey Man. I started to get comfortable, which means that I literally glued myself to The Man's back wrapping my arms around him and throwing a leg over his to just make sure that if the Boogey Man tried anything I could kick The Man awake. See I am so smart from watching those movies! I know its always the pissed off wife that goes stomping to the couch when her husband doesn't believe her that gets killed. If one goes we both go that is what marriage is all about! So I tried to fall asleep again but I couldn't because everytime Loki moved I jumped. So I grabbed fuzzy bear and put him between me and The Man and grabbed hold of both of them and tried again. It was a long night for both of us. Everytime The Man moved I had to move to make sure some part of me was touching some part of him.

Oy! I tell you I could be my own support group.

*Have you ever notice that those girls being chased:
A. run in heels in the woods looking behind them to see if the guy with the chainsaw is still there or did he get bored and go back home
B. screams when its too late? Like when the guy is right on top of them reaching for them then they decide to draw attention to the strange man wth the mask and bloody ax? If one day I let down my guard and go into the basement and end up being chased by the Boogey Man I am pretty sure my in-laws in Toledo will hear my screams.

Well there you have it!

2008-08-18T18:47:00.000-04:00

You Are a Cherry Flavored Popsicle

You are sweet and friendly. For you, summer is all about doing your favorite things.

You are a nostalgic person. You love old fashioned things like ice cream trucks.

You savor everything. Every taste of summer, the feeling of the sun, the smell of the beach...

Of all the types, you love summer the most.

What Flavor Popsicle Are You?

Old friends

2008-08-18T18:10:00.002-04:00

I went to a small Catholic grade school from K-8th grade. For the most part it was the same group of kids all nine years. Oh sure there were additions and some subtractions but for the most part it was the same group. I had the same best friend all nine years and we are still great friends. We met the second day of school when she tried to kill me with a pair of blunt scissors. I, in my understated way, fell to the ground clutching my chest moaning that I was dying and for the love of G-d call the pope or my mom. She leaned down and said "Hi, I am dinky nose (childhood nickname) you want to play?" I stood up, fixed my skirt ( the duchess ALWAYS wore a skirt or dress to school) and we were off. Each year we started off sitting in the same row ( her last name started with a "F" and mine a "G") by the end of the first week we were on opposite ends of the classroom. In the first seat of the row since we both wore glasses but we were a legend by the 5th grade. Teachers would warn each other about the fact that we were best friends and talkative and trouble never seemed to have a hard time finding us. Nothing major, our records did not have to be sealed but well she liked to watch MacGuyver (nope can't spell) and she thought that we could make a bomb with common household supplies. I, on the other hand, read mysteries and I may have thought we had Nazi spies at school or maybe a nun was an alien. You know harmless stuff. Anyway all of the girls in our grade hung out together. There were countless sleep overs, four of us went to summer camp one year and many a Friday night was spent at the movies or the roller rink. Why yes I am old enough to remember actual roller skates:-) In seventh grade one of the girls moved away. Now to 7th graders 15 minutes by car might as well be light years away since none of us could drive. Well Dinky thought she could but legally we couldn't so we didn't:-) We lost touch with her during high school.

Dinky and I went to the same high school and we kind of drifted apart. We were still friends but not best friends. Actually quite of few of the grade school friends went to the same high school but different interests drew us to different crowds and clubs. But old friendships never die. We reconnected in college. Separate colleges but still we talked or sent letters while I was away for that year. She got married and I was there. She got divorced and I was there. I dated really odd people and she was there. I got married and she was there dancing away at the reception and I hugged her tight when she came to see me before I walked down that aisle. Another old friend was there at the Church. Joey was the one that was always ready early at camp because she didn't want to miss breakfast. Dinky and I could care less and we just wanted to sleep.

I just had dinner with Dinky, Joey and Ann. Ann is the one who moved in 7th grade. She is just one of the sweetest people I know. Two of us are married, two divorced, one has kids (adorable boys), one doesn't want kids, one desperately does, one does but isn't sure if that is in the cards. Sitting there the years since grade school (graduated 8th grade in 87) just melted away. It was night filled with laughter and sharing stories. Lots of wine was drunk and spilled (some things never change) and good food was shared and it was an awesome night.

Old friends are the best.

A "typical" phone conversation between The Man and the Duchess

2008-08-15T16:38:00.003-04:00

Duchess: Hey baby on the way home from work can you stop by Home Depot?

The Man: Sure what do you need?

Duchess: Some lawn bags, new gloves the ones I have now aren't very good at keeping the picklers from not pickling me and a hatchet.

The Man: Ok lawn bags, gloves and what?

Duchess: A hatchet. A small one if you can find one.

The Man: A hatchet? Why a hatchet?

Duchess: We need one for a weed that thinks its a tree.

The Man: I see. Why don't I take a look before buying a hatchet.

Duchess: Whatever, we still need a hatchet.

The Man: Babe hatchets kill people.

For some reason The Man does not trust me with power tools or anything heavy and sharp. Hmmm wonder why?

Wow I need a life

2008-08-14T22:24:00.002-04:00

Today I pulled weeds.
I got a warm fuzzy when The Man noticed that I pulled weeds.
I also worked on the office which is FINALLY THANK YOU BALD HEADED BABY JESUS starting to look good.
I got a bigger warm fuzzy when The Man noticed that the office is looking good.

Why am I getting excited that The Man notices when I do something in the house? It bugs me that I feel like I need his validation for my work in the house. I know I need it because I am not working full time and while the life of eating bon-bons may sound appealing in reality I don't eat bon-bons and I like feeling like I am contributing to our family.

I NEED to graduate and get a full time job. NOW!!

So I have a plan in case this therapist gig doesn't work out.

2008-08-12T10:37:00.003-04:00

The Man and I watched the marathon of "Ice Ro@d Truckers" on Sunday.
I now think I could be an ice road trucker. Really you just take it slow only 25-30 klicks and don't brake suddenly.
If that doesn't work out I could be one of the people who dismantle the oil finding accessories when you have to take down a site.
See what you can learn folding clothes on quiet Sunday afternoon?
The Man thinks I am silly but hey no expressways or left turns?? Sign me up!

My Wednesday

2008-08-07T11:11:00.001-04:00

Started with me doing a bunch of paperwork and feeling productive and ended with a client underneath my desk arguing with the voices in her head.

This is why the Duchess loves being married. The Man met her at the door with a hug and dinner.

Happy Ten Months Baby!! Never a dull moment eh?