Thursday, March 22, 2007

The Good, The bad, The freaking confusing


I need to rant and possibly rave. I am tired so we may skip that part until another day:-)

I am in a two week training session for my job. This is very important training because my job somewhat depends on my getting that certificate. Now you know I am also in school, right?

I have to miss two weeks of class. Now I missed two weeks of class because of being sick. I have to miss two more classes for this important training. there are two parts of this training broken up into two week sessions. In case I am not being clear I am going to miss 6 weeks of classes.

I emailed my professor about missing those classes. She understands that I have NO choice in missing these classes however she can not pass me with missing that many classes. So she is giving me incompletes instead of the"F"s that she could give me. Which is nice of her. HOWEVER I still have to attend the classes this semester in addition to taking the classes again in Winter 2008. If I choose not to attend then she will withdrawal her offer of giving me the "I" s and she will give me the "F"s.

Yeah makes no sense eh?

I am grateful that she is giving me the option of getting the "I"s but my life would be so much easier if I could just not go to class since I have to take them over anyway.

Oh yeah I forgot now I have to take 4 classes in winter 2008. Now how in the hell I am going to work full time, take four classes and make my marriage strong and not go crazy?? So now I will have to look for a part time job until I graduate to allow myself to complete the classes and the internship and be able to build my marriage. Yeah fun times people:-D

So The Man and I are talking about our options. He knows that my earning potential increases with a Masters and he knows that I really want it so he is OK with me going down to part time somewhere and completing my education because he knows it won't be forever.

Now to add even more fun. What if I get pregnant soon after we start trying?? We have been talking about that too. I am not good with unclear boundaries. Abstract thought and planning drives me batty. I wanted to start trying IMMEDIATELY like our wedding night. However my boy is nothing if not logical. We have never lived together so that is going to be a HUGE adjustment and being a couple is one thing but being HUSBAND and WIFE is quite another. So he thinks we should wait a bit. A bit? My mind does not compute "a bit". I need a time frame. So I suggested six months so I think we will start trying in six months which is April 2008. Moving on...what if I have trouble getting pregnant?!? Feeling bad for The Man yet? Yeah that is another big concern for me. A lot of my friends and co-workers are having problems with getting pregnant and one friend's marriage was destroyed in part because of her issues with fertility. The Man understands that I have control issues and trouble letting go and just letting things work out for themselves so he told me that I can panic six months after we start trying.

My mind is a very busy place sometimes.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Oh Princess. This is the point in your life where things will get crazy. It always does when there is marriage, school, work and baby involved. But you know what? I know you can handle it. You are a strong, smart individual. You will work it all out even if it means letting whatever happens, happen. Not as comfortable as the controlled, formulated life that you are used to, but if anyone can handle it, I know you can. I love you.